Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Because I have no place else to put this

I don't know what to do with this and it needs to go somewhere. This seemed like a place where I could process this.

During a family dinner on Friday night, my brother-in-law mentioned that while he was out mowing he'd run across "evidence" that a rather large animal had been on their property. They live out in the country and no longer have dogs. There was some discussion of what might be out there.

On Saturday, we all had lunch together (my aunt and uncle were visiting - we don't usually take ALL our meals together). I was a few minutes late and walked in to find a print out of several photos on the table. I looked and was sure I must be mistaken about what I was looking at. But no, I wasn't. It was a series of color photos of the "evidence" that my brother-in-law mentioned. In other words, they were photos of pooh. Four of them. Two of them with my brother-in-law's flip flop in the photo for scale.

And so began our luncheon chat . . .

Uncle Sam: That's quite large. Why, those must be at least an inch and a half in diameter.

My Sister: And look at those seeds. I thought it could be from a mountain lion, but I don't think they're carnivores.

Uncle Sam (peering more closely at the photos): You're right, girl. Those are seeds. Must be an omnivore, but it must be a big one. I mean, those piles are large and there are three of them.

My mother (who is having increasing difficulty talking these days): Were the fec-fec-feces fresh?

Okay. I have gotten through a lot of family moments like this one by reimagining them into scenes for books, but I've got nowhere to go with this. I cannot imagine what kind of book I would have to write to create a scene where everyone sits around discussing poo.

5 comments:

Molly O'Keefe said...

oh no! So what was it? The seeds really are off-putting...

my mom and dad are health professionals and my husband loves surgery talk - without fail holiday dinners turn into disgusting surgery conversations...why?

Stephanie Doyle said...

I think it might be Big Foot. There is a special on the Animal Planet about finding Big Foot and I'm starting to believe. Adding to my conviction that the Lochness Monster also exists.

So I think it's a berry eating Big Foot pooh's.

Just my 2 cents.

Eileen said...

I thought it might be their neighbor up the road who wants them to take out some speed bumps.

They've settled on mountain lion and explained the seeds by saying the mountain lion ate something that ate seeds (like a bunny).

I have a family full of nurses. Dinner conversations are often completely outrageous.

Anonymous said...

Sadly, those pics sounded pretty interesting..

Our family dinners involve us making fun of each other...

Maureen McGowan said...

It might fit into a police procedural of some kind? A clue? :) A poo clue?

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