Thursday, January 13, 2011

I made myself laugh...

Okay – that’s not really that hard. Sometimes I get in these moods where I can giggle over nothing for hours… not even when I’m drinking. What made me laugh this time was that I was thinking about this week’s blog and how I’m struggling to get started with my next project.

The word startabookaphobia immediately leapt to my mind and I thought… “I’ve heard that before. I think one of the other Drunk Writers wrote about this.”

This was great! This was awesome! I could read this blog and figure out what the other writer said and struggled with. Then I would read all the great comments that gave answers on how to overcome this sometimes debilitating condition.

Only when I checked it was me who wrote the blog. Back in March of last year when I started the book I just submitted to my agent. (Jokes on me - I thought was I going to be done somewhere around June.)

I had the startabookaphobia. Damn!

So I read my own blog and realized all the fears I had about trying to merge two genres… still true. My fear of executing the book in my head on to the paper… I essentially realized that fear. I just don’t feel like I went far enough. I know I have to be patient and see what the industry says… but in my gut I don’t feel like I delivered. And I couldn’t see my way through even with all the help I got (Thanks Molly! Thanks Karen!) to fixing it in a way that would make it right or better. I tried. Maybe I succeeded. But who knows.

Anyway here I am now in exactly the same place almost a year later. I have a book in my head.

I’m no longer afraid of genre crossing – because I’m not going to do it. Nanh aahh. Not me. I learned my lesson. Pigeonhole the *bleep* out of me please! This is good.

The fear to execute is still there. This time there will be less major POVS. (Yeah me! Way easier!) However in my infinite wisdom I decided to do two intersecting timelines that have to feed each element of the story.

That shouldn’t be hard right? Even though I’ve never done anything remotely like this. Getting the past and present to weave together and culminate in a brilliant way so that you can see the mystery in the past getting revealed as you solve it in present tense…

Yeah… I have startabookaphobia again. And they don’t make pills for this.

What is everyone else doing this winter? What’s next for ya’all. (Says the girl from New Jersey… but don’t you just love ya’all!)

7 comments:

Karen W said...

Girl, I'm working on my next Nocturne, the last book of the current six book contract. I use the term working lightly, as I am now on the fifth version of the first chapter - my own pecular form of startabookaphobia. Sigh.

Love the ya'll though. Since I've lived in Texas so long, I use that term regularly.

Stephanie Doyle said...

Karen - 6 books. I'm tired even thinking about that number. Don't know how you do it!

Eileen said...

Well, now you made me laugh, too. I actually usually have my startabookaphobia after writing a chapter or two. Then I'm convinced it sucks and that I'll never be able to execute my idea with the grace and skill which with it lives in my head.

Intersecting timelines, eh? Very nice. I love those kinds of books.

Maureen McGowan said...

Steph, you made me laugh, too. I'm revising right now with no idea what I'll tackle next. All I want right now is to be somewhere warm. No, scratch that. To get a contract for this book, so I can afford to go somewhere warm. #amcold

Sinead M said...

There are pills, just not ones that deal specifically with startabookphobia...

Send me somewhere warm as well. Please let there not be kids there.

Molly O'Keefe said...

I guarantee half the posts I wrote three years ago are still relevant now. Some things I've fixed...most of them not. Most of them are unfixable.

This snow business! Putting snow suits on to go the gym. Putting snow suits on to leave the gym. PUtting snow suits on to take Mick to school.PUtting snow suits on to pick Mick up from school... I think tonight is a drinking night...

Stephanie Doyle said...

Oh yes... somewhere warm. I thought it was pretty when it was snowing... white and quiet and peacful...

Then I woke up and had to start shoveling.

Freakin snow!

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