Molly wrote an amazing post at Romance
Around the Corner talking about sex and some of the more sillier tropes that
are used in romance. Including the idea that the heroine has never had an orgasm
with another man until the hero gives her one. Now in general I think this idea
is crazy but I do believe that saying the sex is better between the hero and
heroine is okay. Because shouldn’t sex be better with your true luuurve?
Then I was watching the Bachelorette (hangs head in shame
now) and she had this scene where her friends from the Bachelor return to give
advice. The first thing they ask is who is the best kisser. And I thought shouldn’t that be the make it or break it factor? Shouldn't the person you're having the best kiss with be... The One. At least among that group of men. But then I thought maybe not.
So I’m asking this simple question to anyone who wanders by our blog today. If you are a man or a woman.
If you are dating two people and one has all the qualities you are looking for, but is a bad kisser. And the other person has not as many of the qualities you are looking but is a great kisser.
Will you use your head or the physical connection you feel to choose?
8 comments:
Sadly settled for the sturdier bad kisser for the past 30 years but have a great life otherwise. Read HEA's for the fantasies I miss from youth!
It should be both. I don't think you should ever settle. And both of them would be settling. The person should light you on fire with everything - kissing and mutual goals.
JMHO - going on 31 years together and 26 married
I did not go with the bad kisser. I just couldn't. THe thought of that being the only kiss I was getting was too much when I was in my 20s.
I'm actually still friends with the bad kisser in question. I have no idea what turns our lives would have taken or how it would have been if we were together, but I'm pretty relieved I didn't go that route.
I could never be with a bad kisser. Nope. Uh-uh.
I <3 kissing way too much.
But I also wouldn't choose a mate based on good kissing alone.
But reading Anonymous's comment, I can see that it might be possible for some to survive and thrive. :)
Because the connection between a bad kiss and thirty years of ho hum sex has to be made and no wants to settle for ho hum sex...
But can a bad kisser be taught to kiss better?
I think I'm looking at it as the bigger physical connection.
I do think anyone can improve technique... but if there is not that "something" there - does that matter if a person has all the other qualities you are looking for.
And I really would be curious how men view that.
Speaking as the bad kisser in the relationship... I firmly believe that the bad kisser can learn to kiss better. At least, I hope so. ;)
The way I see it, while the quality of kissing and beyond is important, if my significant other doesn't have the good qualities that makes me happy to be with them to begin with, I'm probably not going to kiss them very often. Maybe that's just me, though.
If you're going to practice monogamy and you can't get better kissing from any other person...I think the hormones have to win on this one.
Though really, the good kisser should hopefully have at least some good qualities. If his "doesn't have every quality" is stuff like he's short (and you're tall and insecure about it) and not rich, I think you'll live if you pick him. On the other hand, if the dude is a scrub but a hot kisser....well, maybe don't pick him in that case.
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