Friday, July 12, 2013

Can Kissing overcome physical differences?

I was thinking about Steph's post yesterday as I slumped onto the couch and turned on the tv to my default station, HGTV. House hunters was on, and for brainless TV, it beats Big Brother.

As I watched, was captivated by the newly married couple, because it was such an obvious mismatch. She was young, lovely and pleasant. She didn't rattle on about needing eight closets, like so many of the women on House Hunters do and in general, she came across as reasonable. Then her husband came on the screen, a schlubby (that's my best description) guy, thirty pounds overweight, kind of unpleasant with his demands for space and improvements and his fixation on football.

Even my husband commented, trying to figure out why a 9 would be married to a 3?

So I watched, relatively disinterested in what house they chose, but trying to figure out why she married him. And there was nothing in the program that shed any light on it.

There are men out there that can marry up. The best example I can think of is the character Chris O' Dowd plays in Bridesmaid, he's funny, cute and a seriously great guy. That guy can marry up, but a schlub? So perhaps the schlub is just dynamite in bed?

It's the only explanation I have.

maybe I missed something important. Anyone else know any obvious mismatches out there? I'm not counting the massively rich and famous in the conversation, because well, that's a whole other conversation.


Eileen said...

It seemed like there was a whole TV genre dedicated to hot wives with schlubby husbands for awhile. King of Queens. According to Jim. Those are off the top of my head.

In real life? I hate to say it, but I think it does still happen if there's money involved. Those marriages tend to have age differences as well. You know, the whole midlife crisis trope.

Most of my friends, however, are pretty equal on the hottie scale. We're getting to an age where we're starting to look alike, too. Sort of like people and their pets.

Stephanie Doyle said...

I think men can always marry up, because women care more about being married.

And although it's changing, the reasons why women married had more to do than just finding love.

They needed/wanted security. Which is why women, sadly, will still marry for money.

I mean take a look at any ugly pro athlete... 99.9 % of the time he's married up.

Then there is the desire for children. You take a hot 35 year old woman, who wants to get married and have kids... her tolerance for shlubbiness is going to increase exponentially as she gets older.

What's interesting is what's changing at least in America is the growth of woman either divorced and choosing not to remarry or choosing not to marry at all. Why - because financially we've made enough gains to support ourselves so we can at least provide our own security.

Anonymous said...

Eileen, agreed, almost all my friends are pretty evenly matched, and it makes sense. And then personality can fill in the cracks so a 7 can marry a 9, but this was so remarked and they were both young, it still has me thinking...

Steph, if you want a good laugh, or just to feel sad about humanity, google Roberto Cavalli and girlfriend.

Stephanie Doyle said...

Not even a little bit surprised. Not even a little bit.

But that's not his problem. It's her problem for finding all of her self-worth in her pretty face and body.

I'm always glad God made me naturally chubby and smart, than beautiful with a hot body.

Because that body and beauty will always fail you with age.

Maureen McGowan said...

I hate all those sitcoms with the schlubby husbands and hot wives. Hate them. It actually kept me from watching (the terrific) Big Bang Theory for a while because after skimming through the pilot, I assumed it would be just another mismatched romance story where the schubby guy gets the hot girl.

But maybe that couple kind of proves that it's possible looks-wise.

I think women, especially, can fall in love with men who are funny, or charming, or sweet, who might not be as "hot" as they are.

But in the situation Sinead's talking about, it doesn't sound as if the guy had any redeeming qualities. That is a mystery...

Eileen said...

Okay. May I let my inner curmudgeon out to play?

Have you all seen that Dustin Hoffman video that's been going around? The one where he gets all weepy about his decision to do the movie Tootsie? Because he found out that women who aren't pretty don't get as much attention?

Everyone's talking about how wonderful he is. I want to jump into my computer and slap him. This was his big epiphany? Did he move on to the epiphany that they don't always listen to the pretty girls either? Or that women are still judged by their appearance first and then whatever they might have to say after that?

Anonymous said...

Maybe they fell in love? I would hope that's why anyone gets married to one another. Without knowing either as a person, it's really too shallow to make a judgement on why they may have been together....ah ya know, I would consider myself a 4 or 5 in the mirror, I would think most other people, men or women would see me as a 5, but I know my hubby always sees me as his 10 and that, I love him for.

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