Smart Bitches stop in for a chat

Today, we are pleased as punch, tickled pink, squeeing with delight, (pick the cliché of your choice), to welcome Sarah Wendell and Candy Tan, of the popular romance review blog, Smart Bitches, Trashy Books, to Drunk Writer Talk. They're here to celebrate the release of their book BEYOND HEAVING BOSOMS: THE SMART BITCHES' GUIDE TO ROMANCE NOVELS that hits the shelves tomorrow -- April 14, 2009.

DWT: Candy and Sarah, thanks for stopping by. Before we get started, what can we get you to drink?

Candy: I'm allergic to alcohol, sadly enough, so a tall glass of cold water is awesome for me.

Sarah: Wine. Love wine. Not so much a fan of hard liquor but red, white, rose and even green? Bring it on.

DWT: Hey, we don't discriminate against non-drinkers (green wine drinkers, maybe). A water and wine coming up.
What sparked you to start a romance review site?

Candy: Honestly? There weren't enough romance review sites out there that were uncensored. I'm not just talking honest, because sites like The Romance Reader and All About Romance existed, and they were fair and honest, but there was this air of constraint and politeness. I wanted a site where I was free to talk the way I normally do, which includes creative profanity (usually for the sake of comedy), and where I could air my unvarnished opinions without fear of offending an editor or website owner. And it turned out that Sarah was in favor of the same thing, too, so lo, Smart Bitches was born.

Sarah: See above re: cussing, and unvarnished opinion. Plus, the two of us approach romances from very different perspectives, and our writing styles are very different. On top of that, we crack each other up like holy cow. It ended up being a kind of perfect storm of fun.

DWT: It's a perfect storm of fun reading, too. Did you anticipate the popularity of your site? The book deal?

Candy: Hell, no. And HELL, NO. It always astounds me that we became as popular as we did, as fast as we did, because neither Sarah nor I advertised. Behold the power of word-of-mouth! We figured we'd be a two-bit blog with a small audience consisting of a couple of friends and family members, but six months after we'd started, we were smack dab in the middle of this insanely active, smart, funny community.

Sarah: NEVER did I think it would be as big as it is. Never. Not a chance. I remember it was me, Candy, her friend in Singapore and my husband reading in the first month. Then, word spread – mostly from the cover snark and the reviews using creative cussing a la Candy.

DWT: We're not averse to creative cussing, here, either. ;-) At times, your site has been a lightning rod for controversy. Do you ever find you need to rein in the comments or get people back on track?

Candy: I'm really hesitant to rein in comments unless people really start to go over the line, because I really think that fostering healthy debate means people should be allowed the space to be assholes. Mostly, however, I think our commenters do a great job of self-policing. For a site known for being bitchy, our commenters are some of the most polite and reasonable around.

Sarah: Our commenters value the community as much as we do, and often they shut down the more obnoxious and awful attacks before I even get to the keyboard to say a word about it. We definitely have contentious debates but most of the time, there are two major points of which I am most proud. One: saying “I disagree with you” very rarely means “I don’t like you,” nor does it mean “You’re wrong and I’m right.” “I disagree” are not words upon which to detonate massive bombs and shit. Two: “I didn’t enjoy your book” does not mean “I deplore the fact that you’re breathing.” There are plenty of people who do the exact opposite of what I recommend – they love what I don’t like, and they don’t like what I adore. I’m as full of shit as anybody. I stick up for my opinion but unless it’s truly, awfully egregiously shitful, I don’t discount your right to your own opinion.

DWT: So, speaking of opinions, here's a more in-depth topic. Clinch covers: for or against?

Candy: By and large, I'm against them, because they're so hard to do well, and they send entirely the wrong message about the genre. They scream: "HEY LOOK AT THE OILED TITTY ISN'T IT GREAT GET YOUR BODICES RIPPED AND PRESSED UP AGAINST THE OILED TITTY RIGHT HERE FOLKS." I do have a sneaking personal fondness for them, though—they're so bad, they're kind of good. I love them the way I love bad reality TV, or schlocky horror movies.

Sarah: Depends. Sometimes, they’re creative and evocative and visually stunning. But that doesn’t change the fact that, as Candy said, it’s shorthand for ROMANCE AHOY AND SEXXING INSIDE, MATEYS. It’s become a conundrum: do the clinch covers sell because they represent romance, or is romance so often represented by the clinch that it can’t help but sell?

DWT: Ah! The chicken and egg question--only with arched backs, bosoms and man-titty. What are your favorite romances of all time?

Candy: The Windflower by Laura London (a.k.a. Sharon and Tom Curtis), because it's a very traditional romance done really, really well—it's a coming-of-age story for the heroine, and she's kidnapped by pirates, oh noes, but never fear, she charms every damn thing she comes in contact with, up to and including the pet pig on the ship. But the authors never let you lose sight that Merry, despite being a bit Mary Sue-ish, is also this awkward, dorky girl in a difficult situation. A few other notable titles are Lord of Scoundrels by Loretta Chase, To Love and to Cherish by Patricia Gaffney (I have a bit of a Thing about forbidden sex with the hot young pastor, and Anne is an agnostic, which makes it all even more fun) and The Shadow and the Star by Laura Kinsale. As for contemporaries, Jennifer Crusie's solo work reigns supreme in my heart and on my bookshelf—I've read everything she's published so far, and only a couple of titles aren't on my keeper shelves.

Sarah: Bitten by Kelley Armstrong is absorbing and I can’t go near it without reading six or seven chapters. The Duke and I by Julia Quinn. I love Daphne because she’s smart and used to men and aware of their foibles having more male siblings than Celine Dion, and I love that the courtship is both angsty and funny, lighthearted and serious – and has some hilariously funny scenes. Born in Ice by Nora Roberts. I love that the heroine is good at making a home welcoming – a skill and art not nearly as appreciated as it should be, and that the hero doesn’t like people and is a curmudgeon. And since I started reading Kresley Cole’s Immortals After Dark series, I’ve found myself yearning to kick more ass than I ought to. The heroines are strong and carry sharp wits and even sharper weapons, and Cole’s narratives explore evil and power and aggression and strength in new and terribly subversive ways. And I’m unable to touch Instant Attraction by Jill Shalvis without reading more of it. It’s like Crazy Glue, that book.

DWT: Fabulous choices. I have a feeling your choices will spark some comment discussion. Also Kelley Armstrong is a friend here at DWT. (Although whether or not she'd admit in public to knowing us isn't clear.) What are your favorite movies and TV shows?

Candy: I love Pushing Daisies. Love love love. Love the premise, love the characters (I just about died when they revealed Emerson Cod loves to knit), love the storylines, love the camerawork and the gorgeous color saturation, love Chuck's wardrobe. Also: I want to hug Lee Pace, then lick him all over. I mean, damn. As for movies: Wes Anderson before he became kind of a parody of himself has a special place in my heart, because his movies focus on these incredibly brilliant, awkward, quirky characters.

Sarah: Movies: All incarnations of Pride & Prejudice. TV: Bones. Love the sexually unambiguous heroine and the smoldering attraction between the protagonists. I love the shifting definition of “intelligent” and “smart” and the manner in which the characters all care for one another. And this might make me a 60 year old on my Barcalounger, but I absolutely love NCIS. There’s a colleague of mine at my office with whom I have very, very little in common except a rabid crush on Mark Harmon. He brings all the girls to the yard.

DWT: I love, love, loved Pushing Daisies, too. (Not to mention P&P, and Mark Harmon...) What changes—good or bad—have you seen in the romance genre recently? What, if anything, are you hoping to see more of? Less of?

Candy: Y'know, in the past two years, I've had pretty much zero time left for leisure reading. I mean this quite literally. Between law school, the book and trying to maintain a healthy social life so I don't become too much of a hermit, my reading rate has plummeted. So I can't really speak about new trends. Although that's an incredibly boring answer, so let's see if I can make something up that's kind of convincing…. less demon tentacle rape, and more romance novels featuring gay, bisexual and generally queer characters. DOH, wait, that was only partially made-up.

Sarah: Jane from DearAuthor.com and I spoke about this in one of our early podcasts, but the lack of secure economy and profit in publishing means that we seem to be seeing more of the same repeated tropes and plots, with very little risk – which is why it’s so amazing when I see heroines doing it differently, like Maya Banks’ heroine in her May ’09 Silhouette The Tycoons Rebel Bride. She’s the sexual aggressor? RWOR. I love subversive heroines like Claudia Dain’s anchor character in the Courtesan Chronicles. I love explorations of what it really meant to be female in English history, like in Carolyn Jewel’s Scandal. I love, as I mentioned, Kresley Cole’s heroines who can and will be evil when the situation calls for it. That said, my cup of awesome is not nearly that of everyone else, so I fear the awesome subversion of expectations of female archetypes will be fewer and farther between. But I can still hope.

DWT: We love heroines who aren't so "perfect", too. What romance device(s) would you like to see die a painful death?

Candy: There's this tendency in genre fiction to use certain characteristics that serve as shorthand for how incredibly evil or virtuous or sexy a character must be. Some of the more popular uses in romance include homosexuality or a love of kinky sex in villains, or virginity in a heroine, or hypertrophied, shouty masculinity in a hero. I think over-reliance on this sort of shorthand is lazy, and it creates facile, uninteresting fiction. I'm much more interested in fiction that dares to take well-known tropes and forms, then inverts them or does something unexpected with them—or, if it uses the familiar forms, then does it really, really well.

Sarah: Shorthand blows. I would also like to see less reliance on the “I’m the hero; that’s why” and “I’m the heroine, that’s why” complacency. It’s related to shorthand but not quite the same, and shows up when motivation isn’t quite as clear as one might think, and the reader has to navigate nebulous plotslines by resting on the idea that the individual is the hero and therefore must have a shining glowy moral core of sternest golden strength. SHOW me the strength. Don’t just presume I know it because he’s the hero, that’s why.

DWT: Thanks so much for stopping by to chat! I'm hoping my copy of BEYOND HEAVING BOSOMS arrives today. Or tomorrow. It better.

Finally, some great news! Sarah and Candy are giving away a copy of their book to one random commenter! Let us know your answer to any of the above questions to enter the contest!

Thanks again to Candy and Sarah and here's hoping your book will bring some new smart-bitch readers to the romance genre!

**Update** D'oh! I just realized I failed to put a deadline for the contest... Leave a comment before midnight Wednesday April 15, 2009 to be eligible to win! Winner will be announced round about Friday. Drunk writers and smart bitches ineligible. Okay, you can still win if you're drunk... But Molly, Sinead and I can't win :-(

Rant on #queryfail and #agentfail brouhaha

This is all kind of old news by now. I mean, The Guardian has even done a story, but somehow I can’t keep myself from wanting to comment.

If you twitter, or if you read writer blogs, you’ve probably heard about #queryfail and #agentfail.

For those of you who aren’t twits, (and really, seriously, the moniker is fitting -- twitter is a huge time suck--fun--but a time suck), twitter is basically micro-blogging. Posts of 140 characters or less. If you add a tag, like #queryfail within your 140 chars, then people can search on that tag and see all the posts using that tag in one long list.

So, in early March, an agent, Colleen Lindsay, had the brainstorm to do a #queryfail day, where she invited other agents to make short posts about things they’ve seen in query letters that made them an obvious rejection.

And the examples were pretty bad. Almost without exception they were things that anyone who’s done ten minutes of research about query letters would know not to do.

Some random examples:

Do not start your query by saying, "I suspect you're inundated with (certain genre), so forgive me for sending you another one.." #queryfail

Why send us a proposal for a television series when we clearly don't represent that sort of thing? #queryfail

“I have designed a unique cover for my book.” Unrealistic expectations #queryfail

Asks me to be patient with their 300,000 word novel because it really picks up steam after the first 50k words? #queryfail

Insists on calling me to tell me about their book because it's too difficult to describe in writing. Uh.... #queryfail

Tell me that God told you I would be the perfect agent for you? #queryfail

Tell me you have an idea for a novel and want to get my opinion of it before you start writing it? #queryfail

And then the backlash started. Crazy backlash. Some writers went berserk. “Agents are so mean.” “They don’t realize how hard we work on our novels.” “How can they publicly deride people like this.” “How come they have time to twitter but they don't have time to respond to my query/read my submission?”

Crazy. Ca-ra-zee.

First, it was all anonymous. Where was the public derision? Second, it was meant to be educational, not mean.* Don’t aspiring writers realize info like this, straight from the agents’ mouths is gold? Third, agents are human, not machines. And they have more things on their plates than just you. The world does not revolve around you. Do you get angry that they take time out of their days to eat and pee, too?

*Okay, it was a little bit about venting and agent bonding/networking, too, but where’s the harm in that?

I glanced at #queryfail a few times the day it was happening, kind of shrugged, ‘cause it was all stuff I’d heard before and I'm not currently seeking an agent… But then I could not believe when I started to see blog posts and tweets about backlash. Apparently, the agents who participated got hate mail and horrible things said about them not so anonymously** such that they felt the need to defend themselves against a barrage of negativity calling them things like insensitive, unprofessional and cruel.

** by not-so-anonymous, I mean one-sided anonymous. The opposite to how the agents handled it. Hateful, personal jabs posted anonymously, but naming the agents.

I was kind of appalled. Okay, I was a lot appalled. ;-)

Then, a few weeks later, agent Jessica Faust decided: why not give the writers a voice? But instead of doing it on twitter, where posts are limited to 140 characters, she invited writers to post comments on her blog venting their pet peeves about agents.

And that’s where things started to get ugly. Oh, the vitriol. And I only read the first 30 comments or so. Last time I looked, it was up to 304.

A few comments were from authors who have or have had agents and wanted to complain about things that they'd experienced, but the vast majority were from aspiring authors who'd been unable to land representation.

I get that it’s frustrating to find an agent. Been there, done that. Have watched friends do it multiple times. It’s a tough, ego-destroying process.

But I also firmly, *firmly* believe that if you have a great idea for a book that’s timely and fits into a recognizable genre, if you do your research about who to query and how to write a great query letter… You’ll get requests for pages. At least from a sampling of the queries you send out.

That said, I do believe the query process is a bit of a roulette wheel. Writing/reading/publishing is subjective, agents are human, plus they all have their own pet peeves. I’ve seen lots of examples on panels or on blogs of one agent citing one thing as a reason for rejecting that was the exact thing that caught another agent’s eye… Sub-ject-ive. But it’s not *that* hard to get requests if you've done your homework. Trust me.

Then, after you get requests, your work speaks for itself. Either it’s great or it isn’t. Either it’s that particular agent’s taste, or it isn’t. Either the agent thinks he/she knows editors who might love it, or he/she doesn’t. It’s that freaking simple. There’s no conspiracy. There’s no purposeful desire to be cruel. There’s no master plan to keep the best, most interesting work away from readers. Yes it’s subjective. Yes the system's not perfect. But it’s the way it works and if you want to play in the game, you need to know and accept the rules.

And if your writing is strong and polished. If your idea has commercial appeal (publishing is a business!!!), then I can virtually guarantee you’ll get some positive responses to your pages--even if it's only a personalized rejection the agent took time out of her day to write.

If one agent rejects your work? Don’t despair. Sub-ject-ive. If ten reject? Same thing. But if 50+ reject? Then it’s time to take another look at your work.

Ask yourself:

• Is it really well-written? Polished. Sparkling.
• Have you studied your craft or did you just expect to know everything about writing a novel by osmosis? (I know how to be a novelist, I’ve read books and wrote some short-stories and essays in school. Oh, yeah? Well, I know how to be a doctor, I watch House and took biology.)
• Is your storytelling tight, well-paced, exciting, different?
• Have you read enough in your genre (and outside your genre) to know your work isn’t cliché or derivative?
• Do you have a strong voice?

Until you can honestly answer yes (or at least I think so) to all these questions (and more), unless you've questioned your skills, recognized some of your weaknesses and improved, you’re not ready. You need to work harder. No one said writing or getting published was going to be easy. And lord knows we at DWT know that landing the agent is only the first hurdle to leap...

So here's my message to the angry commenters on the #agentfail blog:

Dear angry writer:

You wrote a book. Congratulations. Seriously. It’s a big accomplishment. Huge. But it doesn’t mean what you’ve written is publishable.

Just because you’ve poured all your hopes, dreams, money, time into writing and submitting your opus, doesn’t mean enough people will want to read it to justify an agent or publisher putting *their* hopes, dreams, money and time into trying to get it into booksellers’ and ultimately readers’ hands.

If agents are consistently ignoring you, ask yourself the above questions. Then no matter what your answers, continue to work on your craft. Get better. Don’t rant and rage and spit venom.

Get a grip.

And read this essay I stumbled upon today, or a gazillion other great essays and articles easily available (google, anyone?) about what it takes to be a published writer. And then if you still want to have a career in mainstream publishing, put on your big-girl pants and grow up.

Plot and Character Happy Together....So Happy Together

I wish. Oh! How I wish I could just make my plot and character walk through a movie musical montage - holding hands, skipping through the surf, enjoying candlelight and other delights. Instead, I have two toddlers in the back seat of a car - strapped in, tired, bored with one toy between them.

Mine! No mine! I'm not going to be your friend! I'm not going to be YOUR friend!

Not working together, barely speaking all the way to the end.

I totally get that your characters drive your plot -- plot with characters along for a ride is bad for business -- look at Season Three of Lost, Season Two of Friday Night Lights. But sometimes, isn't that just the way things work? And work best?

I really hope that I've put enough time in up front, showing the reader that yes, these are the kinds of characters who get into these kinds of problems. And no, sometimes they don't make the best decisions. And now that I'm in the home stretch all the birds are coming home to roost and these two people have some explaining to do?

I've revealed all this character, shown all this growth but the only thing that can really put this stuff to the test is plot. Big upheaval. Wreck the ant hill and watch them run around like crazy?

That works. Right?

What to write?

Maureen and I are both in the same boat. We’re both trying to figure out what to write next.

And again, the question that seems to plague both of us is, write a book without really thinking about the market, or write a book tailored to the market.

This, for so many reasons, is not a simple question. If I were thinking of writing for a Harlequin series line, I wouldn’t stray too far outside the lines, instead I’d focus on making sure I understood the line and worked to make the writing as sharp as possible.

But for single title it’s less clear. Publishers are asking for stories that are different, with a great hook. There are factors that definitely contribute to a sale. I’d say in historical, and paranormal, having a high level of sensuality is important. A happy ending is a given, and from there, it’s really tough to pin down.
I think as a writer trying to break into single title, it means I need to take risks with my characters and plotting. A couple of new authors have recently blogged that they sold their first book once they put aside their internal editor, and the comments of contest judges/critique partners and wrote complex people that weren’t necessarily immediately likeable, or the standard we have seen in previous romances.
They broke a rule of some kind and it worked for them. But, it’s a risk and as someone who would like to sell, I wish the answer were more straightforward.

But, and we Drunk writers, have talked about this a few times, there are no guarantees of a sale regardless, so no choice is ever easy. So what do I write next? No clue still, but I know I’ll be happiest writing a book that grips my imagination, and makes me sweat while I work out all the plot points and try and make the characters multi-dimensional.

I’ll write the book and worry about the market later. Like I have with my previous five books..

April Fool's Day

Are there some things you simply can't joke about?

I like a good practical joke as much as the next guy (gal) and so realizing that my day to post on DWT was April 1st, I was rubbing my hands together, trying to figure out a great fake post.

Problem was, when I really started to think about things I could post that were even vaguely writing related, the only topics I came up with were things I couldn't bring myself to joke about...

For example, announcing that Sinead or I had finally landed our first freaking contracts with big NY publishers! Or that Molly had landed a huge single title contract!

Or, to go the other direction, that one or all of us had decided to throw in the towel and never write again. :-(

Joking about these things aren't funny to me right now.

So then I started thinking about new genres we might have decided to write in... and couldn't come up with a joke there, either, because for me right now, nothing is off limits. Yes, I'm a genre whore. I'll try anything.

Am I so sensitive about this publishing process right now that I've lost my sense of humor? Or are there some things you just shouldn't make practical jokes about?

In other news, we've all decided to give up booze.




April Fool!

Have a great April Fools Day. Hope you don't get sucked in to too many scams. ;-)

My never-ending struggle to understand and use conflict in all it's proper forms OR it's about discomfort.

Let me start this blog by saying - Maureen is very smart. My whole critique group is very smart. Much smarter than me this week. I was going to talk about how writing is bad for my health, but what I realized tonight is that trying to figure out conflict (AGAIN) is bad for my health.

I'm all revved up. My heart rate's accelerated. I can't sleep. I drink too much. And it's because once again conflict - the slippery devil is wiggling out of my grasp. But anyway -- we talked about it tonight and I had a lighting store's worth of lightbulb moments.

Conflict isn't good conflict unless the characters are uncomfortable. They can't sit down and chat and have tea if there's conflict between them. Unless it's the most uncomfortable tea ever. You can keep piling on more and more conflict but unless it actually shows up between them - in those crackly tense moments we all love -- it's not working. That's Maureen's genius.

Now, I keep saying and thinking (quite smugly) that what good romantic fiction needs is drama. And it does, but drama isn't interchangeable with conflict (which is what I'd been thinking.)Drama is how YOU the writer convey your conflict. Drama is how you end your chapters, and all you have your characters say and not say - it's how you layer your conflict and how you weave in your subplots.

So, again your book need conflict (duh)- but your conflict needs drama. And I need a nap.

What I didn’t know about writing before I started

Well, tons actually. I knew almost nothing, which in retrospect, was a good thing. And I know a lot of the readers of this blog are writers as well, so you all know this, but some things along the way really surprised me.

Everyone who writes says it’s hard work, and it is. It requires looking at your own work critically. Not since school ended have I looked at anything else in my life or professional life and really taken it apart, analyzed it for flaws, thought for hours on how I can make it better. I do hope some of that thinking has leaked into my regular life.
I thought I’d write 100,000 words. Well the truth is, by the time I finish a book, triple that, what with re-written scenes, chapters, entire hunks of the bloody book.
So yep, writing is hard and requires a certain abandonment of ego.

But what I really didn’t realize about writing was how it would seep into every part of my life. I don’t read books, watch TV, or see movies in the same way. I see a great episode of Battlestar, I now need to talk about it, dissect how it worked or what the writers were thinking, or the new episode of Dollhouse that I unreservedly loved, and my husband is tired of hearing about.

The people I work with think I’m nuts every time I try and convince them of the brilliance of Friday Night Lights, because I think I get a strange gleam in my eyes. And forget talking about JR Ward with anyone who isn’t a writer. They aren’t interested in really talking about those books for longer than three minutes, and three minutes doesn’t even scratch the surface of the first chapter of the first book.

Which is why Drunk Writer Talk was invented. Because no one else wanted to discuss the unbelievable brilliance of the Wire for three hours.

I guess when I started writing, I had no idea how storytelling would invade so much of my life, and my thoughts and how passionate I would become about it.

What are you willing to give up?

I find myself at yet another cross-roads in this "journey" towards becoming an author, and one question I've been asking lately is what am I willing to give up?

This is in part because, up to this point, I haven't had to give up a whole lot (other than my pride). Yes, I've worked very hard. Yes, I've spent way too much money on courses, and conferences and books... But I had the time and money so it wasn't a huge sacrifice. Not in hindsight, anyway.

I watch my good friends give up time with kids and husbands, I watch them squeeze writing time into lunch hours at work, I watch them sacrifice bits of their social lives, or, gasp, TV -- and I think: boy, I'm not sure I want it that badly.

But now, I've reached a point where I have to make some hard choices. And it's actually turned out to be a good thing.

To explain, or put this in context, here's a transcript of some drunk writer talk from about a year ago, when I was shedding blood to produce the first draft of the manuscript that's on submission right now...

Maureen: Boy, if this one doesn't sell, I think I might be done. I just don't know what other direction I can take. I don't know if I have another one of these in me without getting a contract.

Molly and Sinead: Shut up and drink your beer. You won't quit. You love it too much.

Maureen: Do I? I mean, sure, I always had vague dreams of being a writer, but in many ways I kind of fell into this. If I hadn't been lucky enough to meet you two I doubt I would've finished my first book.

Molly: Have a french fry. And another beer.

Sinead: You won't quit. You say you will, but you won't.

Yes, DWT is full of gripping conversations like this one. Jealous? ;-)

But looking back at my angst, I'm seeing the silver lining in the hard decisions I'm facing about my lifestyle right now. Said silver lining is that I've realized Molly and Sinead were right. (They're always right--almost always, except about movies sometimes--but I'm a little slow so it takes a while for me to believe them.)

Yes, it's true. In order to become an author, I'm willing to give up more than just my pride. :-)

Maybe even TV. No, not TV. Get serious.

Battlestar Finale

Careful Spoilers...and I'm serious. Don't read this unless you've seen the finale. My Battlestar experience has been fraught with reading things I shouldn't have.

I, for one, LOVED the finale. Loved it. And I'll get to why in a second. The one giant black fly obscuring my total joy is of course the last two minutes and the social commentary by the creators of the show. That two minutes of social commentary is why I HATE sci-fi. It seems to me that most sci-fi writers can not resist the allure of the blatant and bald social commentary. The whole fracking show was social commentary and then they spit in all the work they had done with those last two minutes.

However, I am not dwelling.

The last ten episodes or whatever it was - had some serious serious problems. I did not buy the Caprica/Tigh affair. At all. What a huge waste of time - and where did it go? Nowhere. Nowhere at all. Bad writers. Bad. Giaus - way too much Giaus garbage - I actually felt that way through the whole series. The finale and his role in it would have still worked without all the yammering on about whatever it was he was yammering on about.

But the great moments of the finale - finding our Earth at whatever point that was supposed to be post dinosaurs pre bronze age or whatever -- I, like Maureen was having a little nerd fest with myself. Starbuck with the music and the numbers jumping the Galactica into range of our Earth - fabulous.

But what the writers did right - and have always done right were the little character moments. The wrap ups of little plot lines that end up being such a big deal.

I loved, and could not have loved more the Starbuck story. Everything about it - so good. And that the flashback revealed what it did about her nearly cheating on Apollo's brother with Apollo - it just sort of showed that they really didn't deserve a happy ending. They'd been too wrong too many times. I loved it. She was redeemed utterly for her mistakes, but she just couldn't have it all. A bittersweet character with a perfect bittersweet ending.

Chief - oh sweet chief. Finding out about Kallie and nearly getting them all killed. Amazing. And then choosing to go to an Island in the Highlands were there weren't any people. You know he's Scottish.

The President and The Admiral - perfect. For me that's got to be the longest running successful romance in tv history. They played every card just right between those two.

So? How did you guys feel?

All About the Attitude

I received the nicest e-mail today. Made my day, my week, my whole year.

Thank you, again, to the fabulous Marilyn Brant, whose debut ACCORDING TO JANE is coming out in October 2009, published by Kensington.

And Marilyn got me thinking about two things: keeping a positive attitude and professional jealousy.

On the first topic... keeping positive in this business is always tough. And for me these past couple of years, I'd venture to say extremely tough. (The post Molly made about surviving the submission process was at least in part directed at the insanity she's been seeing in me lately. (Although me reading secret messages into Molly's blog post may just be a symptom of my insanity.)

Anyone who knows me well, knows I'm no Pollyanna, but I think I can be balanced. While I admit I've been imagining the worst case scenario a lot lately and second guessing many things, I just as often concoct elaborate best case scenario fantasies and find the silver lining in my defeats. Keeping your chin up is hard in this business, unless you're totally naive or deluded.

But on to professional jealousy. That's one place where I hope Molly's fab line about crazy inviting professional jealousy over for a BBQ wasn't directly aimed at me. Because I think my brand of crazy tends to invite insecurity over more often than professional jealousy. In fact, these past months, I think my crazy has invited insecurity over for more than a BBQ. They've been shacking up. I'm hoping they get into a monster fight and break it off soon. (Sadly, crazy and insecurity seem made for each other.)

And as Sinead said in her great post a couple of weeks ago, (that I also read secret messages directed to me in), a little insecurity can be a good thing. It can make us try harder to continually get better.

But back to the topic at hand. While I can't claim never to have felt professional jealousy, I also don't think it's one I dwell on. I really can't see the point. If author X sells a book, or does really well, I really don't see how that affects me, except that if I know them, I enjoy sharing in their joy. Love, love, love seeing books written by people I know, or know of, on the shelves or on bestseller lists.

And when people on writers loops get their collective noses all out of joint when a celebrity sells a book for huge bucks. Do I wish I had a big book deal? Sure. But a celebrity getting one doesn't have anything to do with me, so why be jealous or angry? I can't offer a publisher a huge platform or built in readership like a celebrity, or even an already well-established author can.

And even if the publishing world worked in such a way that there were a finite number of publishing contracts available, such that if someone I know scored one, that was one less chance for me, I think that 99% of the time I'd still be genuinely pleased for the person who got one. But publishing doesn't really work like that and I am always glad to hear about other writers getting contracts or their books selling well or hitting lists.

The only times I felt some serious professional jealousy, leading me to say spiteful things to my friends about another writer, it's related to very specific situations where I felt either like I'd been used, or said person became condescending after selling, as if they suddenly knew some secret, or possessed more talent, just because they got a contract before me. Especially if said contract is with a publisher I wouldn't want to be published by. That bugs me. But 99.9% of writers I know aren't like that at all.

99.9% of the writers I know are the most supportive people I've come across in my entire life.

Thanks again for your kind words, Marilyn. You rock!

It's not a business...it's politics.

Okay, Kimber this is an open invitation for you to school me -- but here goes.

My take on the reality of the publisher/author relationship -- it's not business. Not at all. Despite a contract with very clear terms regarding deadlines and timelines and the ramifications of meeting or failing to meet those deadlines - this is not a business arrangement.

Oh, don't get me wrong - the author better meet those deadlines - in fact without plenty of advance warning that the deadline won't be met - woe! upon the author who does not meet those deadlines.

But the publisher might not get back to us on proposals within three months. Or maybe they will. You just don't know. And sure, you can nudge and email and passively aggressively inquire as to what the hell is going on, but there is a line you - the author - just can't cross. Not without pissing off the editor.

And seriously -- this is the politics part - don't piss off the editor. Don't do it. It's like your editor is the Mayor and you are trying to get some funding, some face time, some serious work done. The mayor wants to help you get that work done, in fact the better you do, the better the mayor looks. But there are twenty of us wanting the same thing - or sixty - or hundreds - we want time and money and attention. Let's say, I'm education and another writer is the police force (yes, The Wire rears it's head yet again) if I do what I can to totally serve the mayor, working my tail off and not cause any problems - I might get what I want. But I'm almost assured to get what I want if the police force is acting like a jerk. Or demanding more than can be given. Or not holding up it's end of a contract.

Part of my job is to eat a little crap from the Mayor. Missed meetings, missed deadlines etc... you get my point. I'm not saying just roll over. Or, obviously do things you're not comfortable with -- but realize getting ahead in this business depends A LOT on your editor fighting for you in various meetings. Your editor has to like and respect you and that is something that is earned. Editors are human after all. You want to like and respect your editor right? And once the shine of being published wears off - you realize it's something they have to earn, too.

On various loops as soon as an author starts wondering why we don't stick up for ourselves - reminding everyone on the loop that it's a business not a friendship and if we as authors are required to do our parts, shouldn't the editors? And why the hell can't we just call the editor and ask why it's taking so long? Well, all I can think is that The Mayor is going to be getting behind education even more in the years to come.

It's also why you need an agent - no matter what.

My writing fantasy

I have to preface this post with a reality check. I’m a mother of two young children, with a full time job and a husband who, surprisingly and quite nicely, likes to spend quality time with me.

I eek out writing time when I have energy in the evenings, after the wee ones go to bed, and during my increasingly rare lunch hours at work, but these are short timeframes.

And, (this is not a sympathy bid,) I’m cool with this. I like my job, and love my kids and husband and while I’d love to write faster, I’m writing, so all is good.

But on Friday mornings, when I’m feeling lazy, I fantasize about my ideal writing life.

So here it is.

A sunny, bright office, all to myself, with floor to ceiling bookshelves on three of the walls. A comfy couch for reading breaks and a computer not attached to the internet. (because even in fantasy, I know my limitations. The internet is writing kryptonite)

A full day to write. The nanny would be taking care of the kids. Eight solid hours to think about nothing but story and craft. The mornings would be for writing new scenes, the afternoons for editing.

A state of the art, two hundred pages per minute, printer. A fresh cup of perfect coffee that magically appears, and the knowledge that someone else is taking care of the mountain of laundry piled up in all the bedrooms.

And every four months a research trip, or conference, with my writing buddies. I’d like to go to France first. I’ll set a book there eventually, so it would be useful.

I’d take an hour every day to work out with a personal trainer, because when my body’s tired, my brain sometimes works better. And because it seems really decadent to me to work out during work hours.

Ok, that sums up my perfect writing day. I’m sure the reality is that with eight hours, I’d still only accomplish what I do in two hours, but it sounds so relaxed and nice and my laundry would be done.

And really, can you ask for anything better than someone else doing your laundry.

Surviving the Submission Process

Writer Molly had some wine last night and like a bad split personality - Righteous Molly came out to play. Sometimes it's fun, most of the time I wake up the next morning feeling like I need to apologize to a bunch of people. This morning not withstanding. Maureen - Sorry.

Sinead's post on Wednesday about how crazy we are as writers is all too true and frankly there is no worse breeding ground for the writer insanity than those long desolate weeks of the submission process. The waiting for the phone calls, waiting for the emails, waiting for your life to start again, waiting to feel like writing, waiting to feel like doing anything - it's the worst kind of limbo.

I know we're supposed to just keep writing. Start a new project, get your head in the game - but is anybody really able to do this whole-heartedly? Really? Isn't just an exercise to exercise?

My worst submission hell was after two Harlequin lines had collapsed from under me (and Stephanie Doyle, but again - let's not blame her) . I got a new agent and she's a great agent (but tell that to a person waiting in submission hell - because what you do after doubting yourself is doubt your agent, no matter how good.)

But this process was taking upwards of TWO YEARS.

Two years of submitting to the same editor (who had said she wasn't sure I could write Supers) at the same house I had already written five books for. Two years. I had two supers out on submission and a single title that was going nowhere. So it was silence at one end and a steady stream of rejections from the other. I was hysterical.

I was at a party one night (a fundraiser for a camp for kids with Cancer - which you would think would put things into perspective for me - but no. Nope. Crazy and shallow and self-absorbed, that is the writer out on submission.) I picked a fight with my husband, left the party, walked home crying. The low low point of my writer life thus far.

So, what can you do when waiting? Well, what you really need is a kid with pink eye, or a flu epidemic in your house - something so time consuming that you don't have time to obsess. Barring that - I think you've got to get out of your house. Waiting for the phone or the emails is a long slow death. Exercise, walk, shop, drink coffee, drink booze. Anything to get you away from the computer and the phone.

Read. Read all those books outside your genre that have been piling up around you. But don't read your genre - please. That's the crazy inviting professional jealousy over for a barbecue.

Organize your sock drawer, make dentist appointments, clean out your front hall closet -- all those chores we neglect because we're too busy writing - now is the time to get it done.

And finally, yes, keep writing. Because that's what we are and what we do and the crazy just can't take that away.

Writers are nuts

I know I am. Completely certifiable on my good days. Because so often this whole writing thing seems like an exercise in masochism.

I’m unpublished, which means on a regular basis I’m sending personal work out into the world. The vibe being, ‘Please sir, or M’am, please validate this work that took me a year to create and polish, by liking it’.

Then, even if they like it, I might sell it for, when worked out on a hourly basis, mere cents per hour… and I will be thrilled, believe me.

Even published authors regularly deal with rejections, or revisions, and bad reviews. And let’s face it, most writers I know, myself included, have disgustingly fragile egos when it comes to the writing.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve tried to convince myself to be confident in my writing, in the story I produce and then see that confidence crumple to nothing at the first rejection, or the first less than glowing contest critique.

I’ve even tried to convince writer friends to be more confident, which is pretty laughable, and I seethe with jealousy when I hear of writers who had the confidence to change agents, or turn down publishing deals when they weren’t published, as they fully expected better agents, or better deals to come along. And better agents and deals did come along.
I wonder where they got their confidence and how I can steal some.

But I’m starting to believe that my insecurity might have a bright side. I’m a lazy person by nature, and I usually try and get by doing the least possible. But with the writing, the more I write, the less confident I get, which makes me edit more, question more of my story, re-think more, in essence, be less lazy and work harder towards getting the book right.

So what I need. A lack of confidence when writing the book, and then complete confidence when marketing it… I guess I’ll try and fake it when this book is finally finished..

Switch-Hitter

Great treat today, everyone! The lovely and talented Eileen Carr has stopped by for a glass of wine and a guest blog about switch hitting! (Ooo... sounds kinda dirty... Unless it's about sports.) **Maureen pulls her mind out of the gutter.**

Actually, it's about switching between genres, something of particular interest to me right now, so I was thrilled when Eileen suggested the topic.

Eileen Carr is the alter ego of the equally fabulous Eileen Rendahl, whose DO ME, DO MY ROOTS, is one of my favorite books of recent memory. I cannot wait to see what she's done in her "Carr" incarnation (cool pun). (At least I held back from typing inCARRnation...) This book sounds fabulous and it's at the very top of my TBR pile. **Maureen hangs head in shame for not having read it before Eileen stopped by for a drink...**

Take it away, Eileen!

Switch-Hitter
by Eileen Carr

I am not known for my long attention span. Nor am I known for my ability to stay focused on one thing for any length of time. I tend to get caught up in something, become completely absorbed and then get distracted by something shiny outside the window. I don’t have a favorite color because I like ALL of them. Preferably all together all at once. I can’t quite grasp the concept of clashing.

Reading has been one of the few things I have been dedicated to since I can remember. That said, I rarely stick to reading just one genre. I love romance, mystery, spy stories, thrillers, literary fiction, science fiction and fantasy, to name a few. I even enjoy the occasional non-fiction title. There’s an old John Denver (don’t judge me!) song where he says he’d no sooner love just one kind of woman than drink just one kind of wine. I feel just like that about books.

Now, lucky me, I get to indulge in writing more than one kind of book, too. After writing four chick lit novels as Eileen Rendahl, my debut romantic suspense, HOLD BACK THE DARK, was released by Pocket Books on February 24 under the pen name Eileen Carr and my debut urban fantasy, DON’T KILL THE MESSENGER will be released by The Berkley Publishing Group in April of 2010.

Writing in different genres has definitely made me stretch some new writing muscles. For instance, that plotting muscle got quite the work out writing HOLD BACK THE DARK. It was sore for days. It hadn’t been completely unused, but it certainly didn’t have to work quite so hard when I was writing chick lit books. I’m working on DON’T KILL THE MESSENGER right now and my world building muscle hurts so much I can barely walk sometimes. Setting is always important to me and I used it extensively in my chick lit novels to strengthen the message I was trying to convey, but nothing like the burn I got writing about Chinese vampires living under the streets of Old Sacramento.

It’s always exciting for me to try new things and to get to new places in my writing. The part of this that really rocks, however, is the cross-pollination. I can see how what I learned about pacing and plotting while writing HOLD BACK THE DARK is making DON’T KILL THE MESSENGER a better book and the world-building I’ve done working on DON’T KILL THE MESSENGER is definitely having an impact on the richness of the setting in the romantic suspense proposal I’m working on now as well.

I may never be the kind of person who can focus on one thing long enough to be an expert, but I think there might well be an advantage to my dilletante-ish ways, too. Have you tried genre jumping? Do you think it helped your writing?

Why Johnny Depp makes a great standard for a hero

Let’s start with how insanely handsome he is, which is always nice to have in a hero. I like that he’s very private, hates interviews, and avoids photographers so much, he moved to France to get away from the paparazzi.
He’s rarely photographed with his wife, and almost never with his children.

He didn’t sell baby pictures of his children.

He is vocal in his adoration of his children and his wife. He is ridiculously talented, Maureen would know how many oscar nom’s he’s gotten, and I like that he chooses roles that interest and challenge him, rather than always for the money.
Not that I’m against money..

So we have a talented actor who is also a devoted family man.

What really makes him hero fare is that he is the reformed bad boy. He used to smoke, drink lots, trash hotel rooms and date models. He was known, at one point, for his bad behavior, then he moved to France, met the right woman and became the man above.

Oversimplified, I know, but the reformed bad boy is incredibly rare as most women will attest. It’s almost impossible to change a man, which is why so many smart women marry nice guys, who were always nice.

But the appeal of reforming the bad boy is delicious.

And while the good guy is great husband material in real life, where’s the conflict? It will be bad boys for me, at least in my stories.

She's Drunk Again...Stephanie Doyle and Suspect Lover

American Idol is back … and so am I.

I have a book out this month and Molly asked me if I wanted to blog. You know so I could promote it. See Maureen’s post about Self-Promotion for my thoughts on this. I suck at it.

Okay here it goes… I really liked writing Suspect Lover. It was a much more emotional book for me and the sex turned out very HOT. If you want you should buy it and let me know what you think about it. I would love to hear people’s opinions.

That’s it. That’s the extent of my self-promotion.

Now we can turn to something really important – the new format on AI. This year they’ve opted for 36 contestants instead of 24. Three groups of 12 where only the top guy, top girl and the next top vote getter (be it guy or girl) get through. I’ve done the math and my guess is this is going to mean a wild card night to pull out another 3 from the scrap heap. Go Anoop!

This is cut throat. This is ‘one shot and done’ type stuff. Simon said to more than one hopeful… (Paraphrasing – insert English accent here) “This was your one shot… in front of twenty-five million people… and you blew it.”

Very difficult to hear, yes, but the truth in a way only Simon can deliver it. It got me to thinking how important it is to make that one shot count. In writing I think we have a little more wiggle room. Write a book and get a bad review you have the opportunity to write another. Get a rejection from an editor/agent you can still submit to someone else.

But Simon’s brutal words brought home to me that a writer MUST make the most of each chance. Each outing in publishing - be it a query letter, manuscript, contracted book… must simply be the absolute best you can do. The competition – especially now – is just too fierce.
And what the Idol singers need to consider holds true for many writers.

Did you pick the right song for you? Translated – Did you pick the right type of story for you? If your strength is plot – did you go with a high action novel or some character driven angst ridden novel that falls flat because it’s not in your range?

Did you take a risk? Translated – Did you push yourself to the edge of that range mentioned above but instead of missing the mark you turned it into something fantastic? Safe is for losers in a competition like this.

Were you original? Did you bring something new to the table? Translated – Were you original and did you bring something new to the table. This premise crosses all art. You want to do vampires – go for it, but what new and different element are you going to bring to a vampire story to make it stand out.

Did you practice so that you don’t forget the words? Translated – Have you been working on your craft? Talent will get you so far -- no doubt. But when you’re talking about doing this over the long haul you’re going to need to have those writing skills mastered and at your fingertips so you can call them up at will without having to think too hard about them.

If you only had one shot, one story, one chance to sell it – how good would that book have to be before you let it out the door? So why shouldn’t everything you do in writing be exactly that good. I’m getting ready to start a new project and I have pledged to keep Simon’s voice in the back of my mind the whole time.

Oscar

I used to love Oscar season. I had an ongoing wager with a good friend regarding outcomes and the loser had to but a really fabulous brunch in LA. But then I had kids and stopped going to LA, fabulous brunches are a thing of the past and to tell you the truth - I can't watch many of the Oscar films.

I know this is a product of the kids - but I can't watch tough movies anymore. I spend so much of my time imagining the worst end result of any one of my child's actions through out the day (ie: if I let him walk on the sidewalk instead of sit in the stroller he will get hit by a car and die OR I will rush out to save him and I will get hit by a car and die, leaving my husband alone to raise the children, but in a few years he'll meet a fabulous thin blond and she will raise my children, slowly removing all photos of me in the house. When Lucy gets married she will thank the blonde and call her mom. Mick, so living the new blond will marry a woman just like her, rather than just like me and his house will be neat and clean but he'll be trapped in a soulless, loveless marriage.) that it's simply not entertaining to go out and experience more human drama on film. I've had enough of it just walking down the street with my toddler. Which isn't to say I just want mindless blockbusters, but the middle ground films are few in far between - Little Miss Sunshine. Waitress. I've heard Slumdog is feel good, but you have to get through some children being tortured or something. We watched Babel on the Movie network a while ago - I needed an IV to help with the dehydration caused by crying. I was sobbing uncontrollably almost from the first scene. Not fun for anyone.

Anyway - times have changed - can't watch tough, serious movies. Want feel good fluff.

Adam and I had a chance to go out the other night to see a movie and ended up at Milk, and before the movie I was sitting in the theater, nearly asleep in that nice, hushed popcorn-scented half-darkness getting irritated that filmmakers can't make smart blockbusters anymore, or that indie films all have to be so tough. Remember Apollo 13? Excellent blockbuster. Forrest Gump? There are others, right?

But then the movie starts and f*$! me if Milk isn't amazing. Just amazing. Top to bottom, left to right - good storytelling, excellent EXCELLENT performances - Sean Penn - you can't say enough about that guy's ability to disappear into every single role he takes on. This gay activist is played by the same guy who played the Boston Irish tough guy in Mystic River. Same guy.

And don't get me started on James Franco. Because the guy KISSING Sean Penn and looking at him with such a complicated and realistic mix of love and worry and respect and disappointment is THE SAME GUY who put his foot through a cop car windshield in an effort to see better while driving said car in Pineapple Express. I wonder if James Franco watched Fast Times at Ridgemont High at some point in his youth and thought, while watching Penn, making out with that guy on film is going to change my life.

And Gus Van Sant, whom I already love so much for bringing me Good Will Hunting - manages to make this sad movie, terrible tragedy into something hopeful and inspiring.

I guess my point is, those middle ground movies are still there. But when did the distance between what the public wants and the films Oscar awards get so wide? Not everything has to be a Will Farrell film, but why can't we wrap good storytelling and important stories in candy-coating that will bring out the masses?

Self Promotion

One of the realities of publishing these days -- whether you're published by a major house whose giving your book a huge print run (or a small one), an e-pub with only a website for distribution, or self published -- is that authors need to do self promotion.

I think romance writers have always known this... but it's even seeping into the literary world, evidenced by a quote by Margaret Atwood I recently read... which I really should look up the actual words... but to paraphrase, it was: "shameless self promoter" used to be an insult in the publishing world, now it's a necessity.

But what I keep wondering is: how far is too far? I mean, for me anyway, there are writers out there whose books I will NEVER buy because of their behavior online, or (for a scant few) how they refer to themselves in their e-mail signature lines.

Where is my personal line-in-the-self-promo sand drawn? It's ill-defined and drifts, I must admit... But some examples:

• weekly Facebook requests blasted out to everyone and anyone to buy a book or become a fan. Friend, okay. Fan? If I've never heard of you -- not so much.
  


• calling yourself "bestselling" every time you sign your name or write your bio (especially in venues with other writers who know what bestselling means in the industry) when in your case, "bestselling" translates to being in the top twenty books released, by your e-publisher in June, for two hours, one day when you got your husband and best friend to buy two books at the same time


• calling yourself "award winning", when the only award you've won was an obscure contest where you placed in the top 3 of 5 entries, or your book won an award for the most blatant man-titty cover
  


• being a member of a writing community, but never posting or answering any questions for over three years-- and then posting twice a day for the entire month your book comes out and drawing attention to your book with every post


• drawing way too much attention to a review from a site that rarely gives anything but good reviews (fine to celebrate a bit. fine to post it on your website. but especially around other writers, don't act like you got a starred review at PW, a positive (or even negative) review from Kirkus or Library Journal, or a DIK review at AAR -- if what you actually got was 4 butterflies (or whatever) at a site that gives 4 or 5 "butterflies' 90% of the time, or only ever posts reviews for books they liked. Face it, some of these review sites are in it for the free books. **Maureen braces for tomatoes**)
  

Those are some self-promo pet peeves of mine. But like all things, there are degrees, and it's often all about the execution.

For example, I have no problem with people celebrating good news or telling me when their book's coming out through social networking sites or writers loops... Or sharing their first sale or first review, or a particularly great review, or contest wins (even about covers)... I actually love hearing all that good news and sharing people's joy...

But hear me now Self-or-Tiny-Press-Published-Writers-on-Facebook do you really think you need a fan page that YOU set up and have to ask people to join??? Aren't fan pages supposed to be by and for, well, fans? (Full disclosure... I have gladly joined fan pages for writers I've actually met/know of online, and/or whose books I've actually read.)

I think when you're asking social networking "friends", you don't even know, to be your "fan" it comes down to the wording. I'd have no issue with someone who's honest and says, "Hey, I've started up a fan page for my books, just in case people who've read my book, or are thinking about reading it, would like a place to interact and network, and so I can easily keep you informed when stuff's happening related to my book." That's so different from acting as if actual fans have set up the page, and then asking people, who don't even know who the hell you are, to "be my fan".

I just thought of someone who did this really well... Nadine Dajani's brother set up a "Buy My Sister's Book or Die" group on Facebook when her first book came out. I loved that. It was cheeky and funny... Actually, I think being invited to join that group was why I joined Facebook... Maybe it's just because I know and like Nadine that I didn't find that obnoxious... but I think it was entirely in the execution. I think I would have joined (or at least clicked on the link to) a group called "buy my sister's book or die" even if I'd never heard of Nadine...

J.D. Rhoades' "Gang of Hellions" facebook group is another example of someone doing it "right" in my mind. I don't know the guy... haven't read him (yet), but I did have people I knew who were in his group so gladly joined when I first got invited. And his messages to the group aren't frequent, and are always amusing... And he's generous to other writers--doesn't use the group solely for his own promotion... For example, he has this thing called "clinching" (named for Jon Clinch, author of Finn, who, I assume, was the first author they "did it" for. (And clinching rhymes with lynching, so it's funny... Because there's nothing funnier than lynching... I digress.) Basically the way a "clinching" works, is J.D. sends a message to the "hellions" group telling everyone to change their facebook status to "a fan of whatever-author-is-being-clinched". Great idea... viral marketing on Facebook that's fun and interactive and generous... So different from being bombarded with "be my fan" or "buy my book" messages...

I suppose, when it comes down to it, self-promoting is, at its core, social interaction, and like most social interactions, there's a line that 90% of people never cross... And the ones who do cross it, typically have no clue they've crossed it. (The bull in the china shop so often thinks they're an innocuous butterfly...)

Then there's the other extreme on the self-promo continuum. Like MOLLY O'KEEFE -- who never calls herself "award winning" (even though she should) and doesn't use this blog to mention huge stuff like:

• her latest release THE STORY BETWEEN THEM is out this month and got a 4 star review in RT,
• or that her last book THE SON BETWEEN THEM, not only got a 4 star review from RT, it also got a DIK review from AAR,
• or that she's won reviewer's choice awards from RT the past two years running!
• or that she won "best series romance" in the reader poll at AAR year before last!
• or that she's short listed for the readers' choice best series romance award again this year!! (go vote for THE SON BETWEEN THEM as best series romance. Now.) Update... voting has ended. **Pout** I hope she wins...
  
• or that she's up for a freaking career achievement award at RT this year????

(Lucky Molly has me to toot her horn. She never does it herself. Bad Molly.)

How far is too far with self-promotion? Is there a line? Or is everything and anything fair game, given the highly competitive nature of the publishing industry? Am I riled up for no reason? Will I want to eat my words when it's me promoting a book? Have I just been friending too many people on Facebook? Are some of the pet peeves I mentioned fair game in your books?

Sexy Premise

My coffeemaker broke - this morning!!! I nearly cried. Is it wrong that I view every morning as simply a reason to have coffee? Anyway - the lack of caffeine will be felt in this blog post.

So, I've got all these rita books and some of them are short erotica and Blaze books and they hinge on the sexy premise. Gotta get them in bed as fast as possible. And, not one that I've read has worked. It's either 1. actions and dialogue that are SO just gross. A hero saying something that despite his looks in real life would get his head knocked off. Or the heroine being so aggressive that in real life despite her looks it would get her classified as crazy. It's true however that in real life most men would sleep with her and then call her nuts and never return her phone calls. But my question is - is this sexy? Is this really working?

And 2. Throwing sex into a situation where there is no place for it. A car is under attack - rockets are being launched at the car - it's simply not believable and not even believable in "it's a fantasy go with it" sort of way (And trust me - no one can suspend disbelief like I can.) That a man and a woman are going to be lusting after each other - noticing the six pack abs or the erection! Who is going to have an erection when you're under attack?

I'm all for a sexy premise - and to me there's nothing like a sexy premise in a historical. That is good fun genre. Remember Susan Johnson's Silver Flame? Heroine sells herself at the brothel? Sexy premise all over the place. But, in contemporary romance the sexy premise has to be elevated - it has to be a real plot situation and it can be a great device - otherwise - it's just bad.

We have a winner!

And the winner of Florence Case's new book, DEADLY REUNION, is:

Lisa!

Please contact me at maureen at maureenmcgowan.com.

conflict on every page

I think Maureen took that home from a workshop she did from Donald Maas, but it’s something that hasn’t strayed far from my mind since she told me of it.

But it sounds exhausting and hard and my first thoughts about conflict are fighting, disagreements, disputes, all words that indicate that your character is in crisis. Big drama moments, that can overwhem a reader if they happen on every page.

Then I started to watch the Wire and everything I need to know about conflict is all right there. And yes, Molly got both Maureen and I started on this show and yes, every TV critic ever has raved about this show, and yes, it’s as good as everybody says it is.

What the Wire does, is create several points of conflict for each character. If they introduce a character, that person will cause trouble for someone else. Even the so called good guys cause conflict for each other. The lieutenant of a group of cops is the perfect example of how they create conflict.
He’s a career oriented guy, someone who wants to proceed through the ranks. They give him a detective to watch over that resents hierarchy, but is great at his job. The commissioner is yelling at the Lieutenant to solve a big case quickly and expediently and the lieutenant’s people are telling him this case is too big and important to solve within a week and providing him evidence to support their claims. Evidence his superiors are not interested in.
Right in the middle of all of this, is this lieutenant, whose need to do the right thing is at war with his career plans.

And this guy is a supporting character in the show. The main characters have equally as much conflict, coming from all sides. Its brilliant plotting and it works on every level.

So thinking about it, I’ve decided to re-think certain characters that I usually put into my books. The big one right now is the ‘best friend’. The character in the book that is there as a sounding board to the hero or heroine, the one that listens, offers advice, but does little else. Not enough conflict in that character. Unless, they have a life of their own, something that either contrasts nicely with the heroine’s predicament, or causes problems for the heroine.

I’m going to rethink my characters goals, both big and small, and ensure every scene challenges at least one of those goals.

I’m aiming for conflict on every page, but if I get to conflict on every second one, then I’m better off than I am now.

I’m still exhausted thinking about it.

Welcome, Florence Case!

Today we’ve got a visitor! Everyone extend a warm welcome to Steeple Hill author, Florence Case. And there’s a prize! (Read to the bottom to get the details. Okay, technically you could just scroll down... but you'll want to read this interview. Trust me.)

I’ve known Flo for four or five years now and she’s a super warm and supportive person and I’m absolutely thrilled to see her in print again! Her backlist includes three historical romances under the name Florence Moyer, for Pageant Books and Kensington, and five category romances, under the name Hayley Gardner, for Silhouette Yours Truly and Silhouette Romance.

In addition to being an author, Flo has worked as a freelance editor, and has taught romance writing classes and completed manuscript critiques for the Writer's Digest Magazine School. These days, she’s happy to be focused back on the side of publishing she most loves—creating stories.

Her latest novel is DEADLY REUNION, a February release in the Steeple Hill Inspired Suspense line.

Flo, thanks for stopping by to visit and congratulations on the release of DEADLY REUNION. Did you always know you wanted to be a writer? How did you get started?

Yes, I've always wanted to be a writer from the time I was about ten years old and wrote my first, two page short story. It was a mystery involving children and what was in the trunk in their attic. I wish I could tell you what it was in the trunk, but I've long since forgotten most of the details except that my teacher told me it was a very good story. Then, when I was thirteen, I started writing heroines for my favorite television heroes in westerns or in detective shows, or, if they were older heroes, giving them daughters who would go through danger and have a younger colleague of the hero's rescue them. I think now that's called fan fiction, but back then, I had no idea.

I did this all through my teens, then started writing short stories in college and during my early twenties. I received a couple of great rejection letters for those stories.

Thinking I would spend my life in the Northeast, I got my Bachelor's degree in German from Montclair State College (now a University) in NJ, hoping to get a job as a bilingual secretary, which paid well back then. As it turned out, I married a wonderful guy and moved for his new job to the deep South, where they don't speak German. But it didn't matter, because all I ever wanted to do was write fiction.

I began to pursue that dream, and like most writers, had some successes and a few heartbreaks. Basically, I wrote my million words long before my first two books were published by Pageant Books in 1989.

Where do you get your inspiration? Characters first? Plot? Dreams? Divine intervention?

Oh gosh. I'm convinced Divine Intervention was behind DEADLY REUNION, because lots of that book was unplanned. I would write something down and not know why, and then a couple chapters later, the "why" of it became so clear. It would happen again and again. But generally, I would say my main inspiration comes from situations that grip me and won't let go.

For DEADLY REUNION, for instance: What happens if a murderer is set free, and later it's discovered he is indeed guilty, but due to double jeopardy laws cannot be retried without new evidence--but even more frightening, he's found God and is going to YOUR church? That's what I started with. As I dreamed up characters for the situation, it changed somewhat, but I think the intensity of the fear that would grip someone in the initial situation is still there.

You’ve written in several sub-genres, what led you to try inspirational romantic suspense?

The romantic suspense part is easy to explain, so I'll tackle that first. I've always put, or tried to put, a mystery or danger into each of my books. This was easier to do with historical romance, but I had to hold back, and rightly so, with my straight category romances I wrote for Silhouette, which needed to have the focus on the relationship, not on a mystery. I decided to try not holding back and seeing if I could break into romantic suspense.


The decision to go into the inspirational genre was really tough for me, and to be honest, I fought it. My faith in God is important to me, and I was afraid I would get something wrong, such as writing characters that do not glorify God, or worse, turn non-believers away from God, which would horrify me. But I kept feeling like I needed to write characters who are more focused on God than those I'd been writing, and who have faith that comforts them in times of trouble. At the same time, I wanted to keep them "real", with questions about God they cannot answer, and doubts that pop up, and faith that wavers, because these things happen with believers' lives sometimes. Fortunately, Steeple Hill let me do that.


James Bond or Austin Powers?

Love this question! The movie previews I saw for Austin Powers didn't do a thing for me, so I skipped that movie. The three James Bond flicks I've actually sat through, I think I knitted or read a book and just looked up when there was shooting or some sort of explosives. (I have no idea why movie violence is so interesting to me. In real life, firecrackers going off can send me running straight for the house. I double check--okay, triple check my doors every night to make sure they are locked. You get the idea.) For fantasy or fictional heroes, I think I'm more into police detectives--in which case give me Robert DeNiro in any detective role. I love watching the intensity in him when he's facing the bad guys. I also loved Andy Sipowicz on NYPD Blue. They are both powerful, 'get it done' guys that don't take any nonsense from anyone. (And I don't care if they have a little bulk on them.)

Tell us more about DEADLY REUNION.

I believe this is my favorite book I've ever written. Angie Delitano, a police officer, was betrayed by her former fiancé, a lawyer who got his client, a man she is positive murdered his wife, off scot free at her expense. To be fair to Boone Walker, he did warn her he would do anything to free the man. And now that the murderer is free and engaged to marry her sister, she is determined to stop the wedding. There are just two problems at the opening of the book--she stopped her sister's first wedding, so her family is barely talking to her and barely trusts her, and on her way to dig up some evidence on the murderer, someone threatens Angie's life. So in order to accomplish her goal, she must go to Boone Walker, because, just like with his clients, she knows if he promises to help her, he will do anything it takes to do just that.

What’s next for you? What are you working on?

MISTLETOE AND MURDER, coming out in November 2009, is my work in progress. It's probably better if I don't talk much about it, but it involves a city, Christmas, and a heroine and hero who, the closer they get, the more the villain wants to kill them both.

It sounds just as fabulous as DEADLY REUNION! I’m curious, are you the Florence Moyer that the EPIC award is named after?

Yes, that’s me. When the internet seemed to be getting more and more popular in 1997, I got the idea to put out the call to other interested authors to form a small email group that later became EPIC, the Electronically Published Internet Connection, to investigate the young phenomenon of ebooks. I just had a feeling that ebooks would be big. During the next couple of months, the group expanded and went official, with board members. To help make us more professional, (and because this was before yahoo groups, and a lot of emails were going astray), I bought a program for my computer that would take in emails and distribute them, including in digests if people wanted them. I ran that for a while. I also learned html coding and set up the first web site with graphics that another member sent me.
Later, I dropped out of the group, as I was primarily interested in traditional publishing, but EPIC remembered me by making the Florence Moyer Service Award at their annual conferences. Of course, not being in EPIC, but their having the award named after me, has a strange side too. A couple years or more after I left EPIC, I met up with a member at an RWA conference, who'd heard of me because of the award, and who'd thought I was dead.
Uh, not yet.

That’s hilarious. (About the being mistaken for dead, I mean.) Good on you for all that hard work for EPIC. Wow. (Always wondered how writers survived before Yahoo Groups.) What are your favorite books, movies, TV shows?

Janet Evanovich's Stephanie Plum series--because I was born and raised in Jersey, and that's where her books are set. Anything by Lisa Scottoline because she's funny and sophisticated at the same time. Movies and TV shows: All the LETHAL WEAPON movies because of the camaraderie between the two main characters. Anything with Robert DeNiro in it, and almost anything with Clint Eastwood.

TV shows: 24 with Keifer Sutherland (love Chloe), and Prison Break because of the camaraderie, and I thought it was neat that one brother would go to prison to break his brother out. And anything like Forensic Files, 48 Hours, Snapped--basically any true crime show.

I look at the above list and go ugh, people are going to think I'm violence happy. I'm not, honest. I think the thing is I like to see lawbreakers caught and the good guys get happy endings. But just in case there are more doubts, here are two more movies I loved: RADIO, based on a real story about this mentally handicapped young man whom a high school coach befriends and really helps. Having a handicapped young adult son, this movie is heartwarming for me. And CHRISTMAS STORY, because we've all been kids with that kind of wish. (Mine was for a Barbie doll when I was six.)

I love CHRISTMAS STORY, too. What’s your favorite thing about being an author? Your least favorite?

My favorite thing is being able to stay home. I don't have a least favorite, unless it's writing something and it not selling. I try to learn from it, but it's basically sad.

What’s your #1 piece of advice for aspiring authors?

Read. I know it sounds clichéd, but I'm a firm believer in this. I lost my first publisher to a buy out by a larger publisher, who closed down the paperback line I had sold my historical romances to. (After they were published, fortunately.) I broke back into publishing only when I spent three straight months reading fifty category romances in a row, and marking down what worked and didn't work for me in them. It helped me develop a feel for how to write a category romance.

What’s your favorite drink?

Ice tea. No sugar. I used to drink tons of it, but had to cut down on caffeine. Years ago, in my wild days, I used to love tequila sunrises, but drinking gave me migraines the next day, so I had to stop.

I want to thank Maureen and Drunk Writer's for having me. I enjoyed the interview.

We loved having you Flo, and the next time I see you in person, the iced tea’s on me.

**One lucky commenter, chosen at random, will receive a copy of DEADLY REUNION.**

Comment by Friday the 13th at midnight to be eligible. Winner’s name will be posted on the weekend.

The End

What makes a satisfying resolution to a romance novel? This has been on my mind a lot lately. My current WIP is a series, 5 books, where the overriding suspense arc won’t be completely put to bed until book number 5.
The bad guy in the current book won’t get his ending until book number 3, and while I will answer some of the suspense questions I raise in the book, I won’t be answering all of them.
The one thing I will resolve is the romance, my hero and heroine will be together and committed to each other by the end of the story.
This is more and more common with the influx of single title series books within the romance genre, but coming up with an ending that the reader finds satisfying, while still leaving a lot of questions unanswered, is really, really tricky.

It’s a fine line between getting the reader excited to buy the next book, and frustrating them so much that they throw the book against the wall.

I’m lucky because I have a critique group who will tell me whether it works or not.

And not all of the characters I introduce in the story will have a happy ending. A couple of them will have a miserable ending, again, something that will frustrate some readers.

I’m thinking of the books I’ve read where the author leaves a lot of open questions at the end of each story. The Brotherhood books to a degree, where the big bad continues to wreak havoc, and certainly the Anita Blake books, where the romance was left unresolved at the end of most of the books.

And I think like most things when it comes to writing, it’s all in how well, or not well, it’s written.

Writing and Jazz

The other morning, I heard a TV critic being interviewed on the radio, and the topic drifted to Lost and whether or not the critic believed the producers'/writers' claims that they've known, from the beginning, how it all ends and that everything that has gone on ties in to the overall story.

I found the critic's reply to be insightful and it made me think more about writing a series of novels, or even a single novel.

The critic said writing a TV series was a bit like jazz improvisation.

"Yes!" thought I. You know the basic melody when you start, you know where you think you want it to end, you know some of the high and low points you want to reach, you know the notes you'll play most often and which phrases, themes will get repeated, BUT you have no idea when your song will get cut off or how long the piece will last or where it might go along the way. At any moment, the audience might start throwing tomatoes, (gumming up your trumpet and forcing you off the stage) or might start cheering just as you were planning to end, and caught up in the glory, you might decide to play some more.

I think writing a series of books is like that, too. (Says the girl just starting the second of what she hopes will be a 4-6 book series.)

When I saw J.R. Ward talk last fall, she said that she had ten books in her Brotherhood series all mapped out in her mind before she started. At first, this freaked me out. But as she continued her talk, and after reading her "Secrets of the Brotherhood..." book, I came to believe she saw them all, in the same way the makers of Lost saw their series from the beginning. Loosely, with no idea how long the story would be. Ward had no way of knowing how many of the books she'd get to write and how quickly she'd have to tie up all the loose ends and how many unexpected twists and journeys she might make along the way that came out of the writing process.

I think the key is to have an overall plan, but to make it scalable and flexible... both to take advantage of the amazing magic that is sometimes writing -- discovering better and great ideas along the way -- and also to hedge your bets in terms of how many of these books you're going to get to write.

I guess I'm not really saying anything new, or revolutionary, here. I just liked the jazz improv analogy.

Off to tune my trumpet.

(And the Lost writers had better come up with a good explanation for that smoke monster! Methinks they were playing a little off key when they added that.)

It's About Trust...

It's like Christmas morning right now with all of this fabulous television, my DVD's of The Wire and my big box of Rita Books. Seriously, I'm so entertained I don't know what to do with myself. Lost isn't making me crazy yet, Friday Night Lights is like eating a big bowl of home made macaroni and cheese and Battlestar! Sweet sweet Battlestar.

Will watching this week's episode I realized the writers of Battlestar and The Wire have never betrayed me. They've never taken my trust and gone running off into crazy plot land, or extraneous character-ville. I trust them. I trust them so much that when they introduce something new, something delicious and subtle and small - I know I'm in good hands. I know that small detail is going to matter. It's going to be big in a way I won't see coming. When they introduce those new details, or characters or subplots - I'm thrilled. I literally rub my hands together with glee.

Lost does it and I'm like - "what the hell are they doing now." Because Lost took my trust and went berserk. And while Friday Night Lights is doing a great job, I still remember the dead body subplot from season two and when something new crops up on the show, I'm worried. Nervous that they'll blow it again.

I've had some excellent Rita entries this year. But I've had a few that don't even bother to try and earn my trust. Because trust involves mystery. It requires the reader to say - well, not too sure where you're headed, but I'm with you. You've got me.

And the last few books have been spoon-feeding me character and backstory and conflict, like they don't trust me to get there on my own. Trust, clearly is a two way street.

So, my takeaway is that unless we trust our readers to follow the breadcrumbs, they're never going to trust us to take them someplace fabulous.